everyday public relations

It seems that Facebook is all over the blogs and on everyones mind lately. In Maine it is solving crimes and in Georgia there was a story in today’s paper about the whole content/privacy issue.

Not too long ago many people were weighing in on the whole 25 things floating around, even to the point of creating groups to protest. Personally I kind of got into that list thing, but then I only got tagged a couple times. I guess it is because I am a total nerd for the random info in my head (my friends count on me for trivia all the time). This article was a little more positive but still concerned with the amount of info online.

So with all this negativity, I though I would share something positive about this social media tool that may be getting missed in all the privacy/leave me out of the 25 things hoop-la.

So I got a strange request from my boss not too long ago. I was asked to cruise Facebook of all things…on the clock. Turns out as many of us already know, there is this application called “causes” that basically allows you to either show your support for a particular cause, or to create your own. Not only can you recruit “friends” you can also raise money for your particular cause.

The GA state parks friends group as a page, so when my boss wanted me to look into it for our own 501(c)3 friends group I was all for it. After all we are stretched pretty thin….budget wise anyways, as everyone who works for the state is aware of.

If you have a non-profit, what better way to reach out to people than through an online tool that reaches approximately 8 million people all over the world, second in the number of users only to Myspace. Started in 2004 by Harvard grad Mark Zuckerberg, the company offers the ad-supported site to anyone to use free of charge.

So if you are an organization that relies on donations, word of mouth marketing and viral buzz in order to survive, I can’t see a much better way than to take advantage of this awesome tool. Some are worried about credibility and not looking respectable but with our economy in the toilet and non-profits shutting their doors everyday, why not get creative and start looking to what’s out there. Maybe I am just realizing that the old adage is true. If you can’t beat ‘em…join ‘em.

See you online.

Saying no has always been hard for me. There are a ton of possible reasons why this is true. I’m a girl, I had a crazy childhood, my mother is domineering, I’m a southerner, a people pleaser……etc.

Whatever the reason, being able to confidently say no to a superior is an important skill. It is not your boss’s job to know every mundane detail about how busy you are and every project you have on your plate. They see the end results and do not know, or care(most likely) about how that end comes about as long as you continue to smile and be productive.

So what happens when you are overloaded, stressed out and about to fall over from lack of food and the boss walks in 10 minutes before you are supposed to thankfully leave for the day and says, “oh by the way, can you present to the board tomorrow morning? You will need to talk for 20 minutes about the efficacy of using rubber suction cups on disentangling right whales” or some other highly complicated subject that is totally out of left field.

Now what?

On the one hand you are flattered that the boss obviously has a large amount of faith in your abilities. On the other, it is boy scout night, the baby is sick, your homework is behind and you haven’t spent any alone time with the hubby in weeks. You simply do not have time to do the research needed.

Obviously this seems like a silly premise, but I promise you there are people everywhere who know exactly what I am talking about. And I am not alone. I posted a poll on LinkedIn asking professionals everywhere how they say no. (You can take it to and I will post the final results right here next week. )

Know what I have found out so far? Girls are more likely to make up an excuse, rather than say no. Come on girls!!! That is exactly the wrong thing to do. Very few of us are good liars and in most cases, the excuse will come out sounding flimsy. Not a great career move.
So how DO you say no to the boss? Here is what I have learned so far. Put these tips to use and they just might gain you a little respect as well as help you build your confidence in the work place.

1. Tell yourself everyday that you are a good employee and are worthy of having respect and adequate notice from the boss.

2. When given a task that you simply can’t do, do not lie, make excuses or just suck it up. Your boss is human too, (at least most of them are). They have a life and a career and will understand, if you are up front and honest.

3. Most requests are simply that,a request. Unless you are in national security, you rarely receive orders. You can explain why you can’t complete the task, but even that is not always needed. For the most part, he or she will simply go on down the line to the next person.

4. Have a back-up colleague in the office. It is so nice to know when someone has your back. Keep up with what each other is doing and then when you can’t help your boss, be able to suggest someone else who can. (Just know that they will do the same)

Remember, there is no reason to be continuously stressed and overloaded because you are afraid of what your boss will say. If you are doing your job to the best of your ability, then there should be no problem with turning down a request every now and then. Your boss will respect you for standing up for yourself (great career move).It will make you more confident, and more productive, as your work will be higher quality if you are concentrating fully on 3 projects instead of rushing to complete 5.

So how do you say no? Take the poll .

I read a post recently that really hit home. I started my blog for a school assignment and thanks to a wonderful teacher and mentor, I got “hooked” on blogging.

As a public relations undergrad, having a PR blog made sense, but as I grow and move on with my career (and my life) it has become harder and harder to come up with new and interesting posts regarding to public relations. I am much more interested now in how one can apply the tactics and strategies learned in PR and apply them to the rest of…well life.

I never wanted a super corporate PR position, preferring to do something a little more low-key and certainly more fulfilling (in my opinion only) in my quest to save the planet, or at least contribute to that end. (My regular readers are well aware of my hippie upbringings and dedication to social causes, but if you are new check here for some older entries to get you better acquainted.)

I love to write, and I love to blog, but I have so much more going on that I am thinking that I need to take a step back and re-evaluate my blogging purpose. I lead a very busy life and find it harder and harder to cram in the time required for a decent and thoughtful post every week. (my goal is to post every Tuesday.)

I want to help others, and I want to help the world and I honestly feel that my ability to and love of writing is my gift, given to me for the specific purpose to use for doing what I crave, helping others.

I have considered changing topics, hosts, themes, you name it. Something needs to happen, I just can’t put my finger on it. I am not ready to lay down the old pencil just yet, so don’t worry just yet.

So on that note, be on the lookout for some new and interesting changes at Everyday Public Relations. Come back soon.

My graduate nonprofit class spent a great deal of time today talking about change. It got me thinking about how change can be harnessed, how people react to it, study it and how the concept of it is used everywhere from altering school board decisions to winning presidential elections.

Human beings are naturally resistant to change. We are creatures of habit and crave the comfortable security of our same-old, same-old comfort zones.

I’ve written before about the changes that the public relations industry is going through and how we must either adapt or be left behind. This post delves a little deeper into the process an individual (PR pro or otherwise) must go through when confronting change on a large scale, whether they are taking on a new client, electing a new president, accepting a new position or simply deciding that maybe your old ways of doing things are a little outdated and need a face-lift.

There are a couple things that one must take into consideration first, when contemplating a large-scale change within their current organization.

Create readiness. NEVER spring a sudden change upon staff or clients. You set yourself up for failure by doing this and may find yourself the victim of mutiny (or as it is called in the civilized world, a hostile takeover).

Show, don’t tell. Provide real examples; show the discrepancies between what works and what doesn’t. Having examples of successful organizations or firms that implemented similar changes are a huge plus and a strong motivational tool for those on the fence. Let them see how they will benefit and then on the flip side, provide examples of those which have remained stuck, with little innovation. The more extreme the distance between the two examples, the better tool this will be.

Okay, so you have implemented your changes. Excited, you expect big things but there is just one problem, not everyone is on board. Now what?

Overcoming resistance

There are three types of resistance to change. Cognitive, Emotional and Behavioral.

Cognitive resistance usually manifests itself in the most frustrating way. It is hard to identify and can be a real challenge when trying to educate your clients/friends/constituency or whatever. This is the person who smiles and nods and then politely ignores everything you have to say.

Emotional resistance has deeper roots and is harder to identify, but has some telling signals. It is generally based on years of decision-making and deep-seated convictions which will cause a person to shout, cry or become overwhelmed. It can be tough to remain calm, because an emotional person will look for you to be reactionary. Don’t play that game. You won’t win. Just be steady and tow the line.

Behavioral is the easiest resistance to spot - usually because the person is either screaming in your face, or if you are really lucky, throwing garbage or animal parts on you. Do not engage in retaliation. EVER. You will never appear to be the victor. As with those who cry and scream, remain calm, walk away and keep your finger’s crossed that eventually they will come to at least agree to disagree without any obvious sabotage.

So in light of all this, what do you do? Here is some information that will hopefully help you get through it, without having a nervous breakdown.

My place of employment is fairly resistant to change. It is still run primarily by men in their 50’s who look at me like I’ve grown a second head when I start talking about social networking and blogs. To be fair, they like the idea of it all, they just don’t really GET it, or how it can help their bottom line. Anyways….

There are three stages of change, much like the stages of grief. My professor did an awesome job of communicating the idea to us using the analogy of a sky-diver. First you make a decision, get over your fear, whatever. Then you have to go to the place and go through the safety course and then actually get on the plane. Lastly you have to jump. That’s a big one, involving a huge range of cognitive, emotional and behavioral sparks that all have to come together in your brain just right for you to actually get out the door of that airplane.

The first stage, oddly enough is the ending stage. This is where you are acknowledging that the way things have always been done is coming to an end. In my industry and many others this is known as the “changing of the guard“. It is a tough time for many. Letting go of your comfort level can be extremely difficult. You can help your employees and clients through this time by providing adequate support, additional resources for information and showing examples of those who have successfully gone before.

(This is assuming that you are not the first!! If so, then you just have to go for it or sit back and wait for someone else to fall on their face. )

The second stage is the neutral stage. In this stage you have pretty much accepted that things are changing, but you are not quite “there” yet. You are not fully opposed anymore, but you are not fully on-board either. You still have doubts. This stage is crucial. Think of the swing states in the election, the undecided voters. This is your chance to really shine and show what you are made of, and why the change will be so beneficial. This stage is all about showing, reinforcing and providing support. You must be prepared for setbacks, and it is not easy. You will have backsliders, but if you persist, you can and will reach the next stage…

Lastly you have the beginning stage. Ahhhh…new beginnings. Doesn’t everyone just love the honeymoon stage? Everyone is excited, and anything seems possible. You mustn’t lose sight however that you are not the first person to implement change. It is a never ending cycle of slowly fixing a system that is broken or appears to be now, but wasn’t always that way. Like a clock with a million tiny parts, it might take some time and effort to figure out not only what is wrong, but after fixing it, how to put it all back together again. It doesn’t always work the way you think it should, but that doesn’t make it wrong either. You may just have to modify your perception of what is “right” and “wrong”.

It is important to remember that real change takes time. Just as with all the excited people (me included) that got Obama elected, I can really feel that there is a fervor in the air that is truly palpable. Change is possible, but you still must go through the process, nothing good is ever easy.

We, as a nation must go through these steps of change together and my hope is that we make it through the tough times, in order to truly celebrate a new beginning.

“We will not destroy the planet and are arrogant if we think we will, the Earth will shake us off like a cockroach, which we essentially are….parasites that feed off the available resources without considering the limits of our excess.” - anonymous

I rarely watch television anymore. And apparently, I am not alone. My family has actively forgone the whole cable scam and therefore even with the aluminum covered rabbit ears we really don’t get much other than public broadcasting and the Spanish channel (for reasons unknown to me it is the clearest thing we get…)

However, we were able to pick up a fuzzy CBS tonight and I watched the presidential debates tonight….I am glad I did. Although I have pretty much made up my mind ( I am wearing an Obama T-shirt after all), I really wanted to hear McCain talk about things like health care, abortion and taxation.

I have to say I think that Obama did a better job this evening. He didn’t get nasty although he did get a few well placed shots in. I honestly felt that McCain skirted many of the issues presented and spent more time telling us about what was wrong with Obama and his campaign than what he [McCain] actually stood for.

From a PR standpoint, Obama did a better job at appealing to the public and defending his decisions with well documented facts rather than using attack methods. He was calm, collected and did a good job of presenting his point of view on several controversial issues without going so far as to “attack” McCain for his policies.

Maybe I am biased. There are after all many studies that show that we tend to hear only what we want to hear especially if we have in any way made up our minds…however, I think that McCain and Palin are simply not right for this country at this point in time.

I do not agree with all of Obama’s strategies, primarily his support of the “clean coal” initiative which is an absolute farce (in my opinion of course) as well as his sudden flip-flop on off-shore drilling. But overall, I think that despite his having less political experience than McCain, he has more of a disconnect from the “good old boy” network and will do more for the common/average American citizen than McCain.

I will admit that I sometimes wish it had been an Obama-McCain ticket–that would have been awesome.

If they could just work together…well that would have really been an awe-inspiring precedent for future political campaigns.

When it comes down to it, negative ads don’t really do a whole lot as far as influence….but having a real, factual-based argument is what is going to really convince voters. (at least those who are actually intelligent enough to make informed decisions. Unfortunately this country is often run by narrow-minded individuals with limited education who assume that whoever is on TV spouting bible verses is obviously fit to be a leader. You know some countries consider that to be a dictatorship…) Thankfully there are voices of reason out there.

I love living in a country that encourages outlets for free expression, like blogs. I hope that whoever is elected, we will continue to evolve as a democratic society that truly values the voice of the many rather than the limited voices of the elite few.

Want to disagree, or maybe even just agree to disagree? Let me know and keep the information flowing. That is what our country was based on after all.

Here are a few tips as well as some great posts that provide a ton of need-to-know information for the newbie blogger. Enjoy!

1.The Urban Muse - 10 tips for new bloggers and 5 terms every blogger should know

2.blogbloke - Best blogging practices

3.Brazen Careerist – great site for all Gen Y’ers who are trying to get out there and make a name for themselves through blogging. The founders, Penelope Trunk and Ryan Healy are quick to answer questions and are a wealth of information.

4. TeachingPR (my blogging mentor and a great reference besides!) Always great info for new bloggers that are into all aspects of the PR world.

5.Do a guest post – I recently did one of these for a fellow brazen blogger. They are a great way to get your feet wet as well as a way to write about things that may not necessarily fit within the confines of your particular topic.

Got more?

I’d love to hear ‘em. Post a comment and share the wealth!

Probably one of the best PR and advertising campaigns of all time: Smoky the Bear.

I am a big supporter of prescribed fire. But you have to admit that this one image did more to set back the natural progression of species (plant and animal) evolution than most any other campaign in history….except maybe the cigarette campaign that convinced women that smoking was a sign of “Independence”……that is a hard choice….

Anyhow, I got to thinking, what are other campaigns that have been hugely sucessful? I am throwing this question out to all my fellow brazen bloggers as well as my new PR comrades. What are the best campaigns of all time, what sticks in your mind?

Let me know and I will include it in my next post!

Phintern the Super Wildlife Secret Agent!

There is a great article out in this month’s edition of Body and Soul magazine. The column by staffer Terri Trespicio details why it is important to cut yourself a little slack now and then.

Suffering from perfectionism myself, I was drawn to this article with a kind of fascination usually reserved for writing and re-writing and then writing again my blog posts

The point of the article is that there are steps we can take to break out of the perfectionist mind-set in order to empower our decisions so we can move forward with our lives both personally and professionally. Thanks to Terri for the great article.

Hopefully these things will help you as much as they did me.

1. Remove your mental filter. – Perfectionists often only hear the negative news, letting the positive reviews go in one ear and out the other. Try readjusting your mental sieve and allow some of the good stuff to stick
2. Discover the joys of getting it wrong. – Start looking at your flaws as opportunities for personal and professional growth. Nobody likes to be wrong but being able to accept and learn from mistakes will make you a better person both in and out of the boardroom. Dan Baker, Ph.D and co-author of What Happy Women Know, says this, “Think of making a mistake as paying tuition, once you’ve paid, you might as well learn the lesson.”
3. Compare yourself to others, realistically. –Maybe you do enough of this, but you probably don’t see others with the same foggy filter you see yourself with. Try taking notice of your peers. Do they take shorter/longer lunch breaks, make the occasional typo, and lock themselves out of their cars? If they are not perfect then why should you be.
4. Put people before things. – Put the people in your life before your stuff. This may seem like a no-brainer, but how often (and be honest here) do you find yourself late getting home again because you just had “one” more thing to get done at the office? How many relationships fizzle because one person is already married…to their job? It happens all the time so take a good look around now. If you log more hours at your desk than say the average mouse pad, you need more face time with your friends and family. Even if you are a busy CEO, taking some quality time will pay off in more ways than one as it is well established that happy workers (with happy families) are much more Productive, efficient and effective.
5. Prioritize your perfectionism. – This too is hard to hear, since with all perfectionists, of course we want to be great at everything. The article states this however, “Instead of trying to master everything, pick some things you want to excel in.” As Penelope Trunk once stated in her book Brazen Careerist: The New Rules for Success, (and I am most definitely paraphrasing) specialization is a wonderful thing. Being a little good at everything (or half-assed at everything) will not win you any awards and will definitely not fatten your wallet. Pick a few tasks/topics/subjects etc. you really excel at and work on them. For me it is persuasive advocacy writing and graphic design particularly in regards to wildlife publications. I am by no means a scientist and can’t list the statistics of every endangered species but I can create a really pretty picture with words and photos that will make even the most hardened ant-environmentalist want to read more.
6. Let a dirty sock be just a dirty sock. – Ahhh… the joys of a clean house. I admit that I am severely embarrassed to have people over to my house without say a month of advanced notice. Ok so maybe I am not that bad, but hey with three kids and both my partner and I working full time there is not a whole ton of time left over for house cleaning. The article claims that seeing small-scale messes as a personal failure is actually a cognitive disorder (do they make a pill specifically for the racing heart and cold sweaty palms I feel whenever I open my 10-year-old’s closet door, right before the entire contents come crashing down on my head? Probably) Anyhow, I take great pride in my work and my family and am starting to let go of the dirty sock as global disaster mindset. All three of my kids are turning out pretty darned well and I am succeeding at work and in my personal life so I must be doing something right, even if it’s not the laundry. Rather than react emotionally, see things like socks, dishes and dust for what they are, everyday facts of life that need tending to, not evidence of your incompetence.
7. Focus on wellness not weight. – Another big one for me. After three kids I will never pass as a super model but being okay with myself is a constant challenge. In addition to personal (sometimes unrealistic) goals, there is also the added pressure of working is a somewhat public industry. Appearance does matter in public relations, however taking care of your self, having trimmed neat nails and clean suitable clothes are a heck of a lot more important than being the one on the office with the tiniest waist.
8. Age gracefully. – A few wrinkles does not make you a bag lady, it adds character really! According to Baker what makes us truly attractive is more about confidence, carriage and hard-won wisdom rather than firm skin or how much you resemble a fashion model. And just a tip from me, those women who do go all out to look 20 years younger often come off as unprofessional or unapproachable or worse “that old woman from accounting with the peel on face and skin tight leopard-print skirt who gives me the creeps.” Don’t be that person.
9. Counter the negative with a positive. – This goes back to number one on the list. Often perfectionists only hear the bad things and assume they are doing it all wrong. In order to stop this kind of thinking, try to automatically counter your negative thoughts with three happy ones. As corny as it seems, even having a list works wonders when you are at risk of sliding into the dumps. My list is wallet sized and changes periodically, but serves to remind me that I am a good mom, a good writer and a successful businesswoman.
10. Kick black and white thinking to the curb.– Last of all get rid of the all or nothing mindset. There are shades of gray in just about every situation on Earth. Remind your self those temporary moments of insanity (having an extra dessert, a bad hair day or being 15 minutes late) does not mean you are fat or lazy or an incredible slacker. Give yourself credit for all you do right and understand that in the end we are all just human.

What do you do to beat your perfectionist tendencies? Does any one have some creative ideas or feel more should be added to the list? Send me a comment!

To read the entire article check out the June edition of Body and Soul Magazine.